Showing posts with label woman. Show all posts
Showing posts with label woman. Show all posts

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Enjoy the quotes

Detail of Vibrant Pink Spring Cherry Blossom Tree Stock Photo - 4741281 


1.It does not matter if u try and try and try again, and fail.....It does matter if u try and fail, and fail to try again:) Charles Kettering.


2.A woman has to work twice as hard as a man to be thought of as half as good.
Luckily,this is not difficult.;)


3.A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,”Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.


4.Success is a great deodorant. It takes away all your smells.


5.Due2cold a bird froze n fell to the ground.While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung,he began to realize how warm he was.He lay there all warm and happy, and began to sing for joy.A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.The cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung,n promptly dug him out n ate him.
Moral of the story:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3.And wen u r in deep shit,its best to keep ur mouth shut:0



6.A Mother is a person who, seeing there r only 4 pieces of pie for 5 people, promptly announces she never did care for pie! Teneva Jordan


7.Laughter is like changing a baby's diaper ! It doesn't permanently solve any problems, but it makes things more acceptable for a while ;D


8."if the plural of Mouse is MICE. then the plural of spouse must b SPICE"!!!!! ha ha ..how appropriate;))


9.Ask him to take u out and he wants to relax at home;decide to relax at home and he invites friends for dinner; dine out and he finds the children are nt well-mannered; try to manner them and he feels u r over-demanding; demand little and he wants u to share ur dreams;share them and he wants to change the topic;change the topic and he knows he has upset u;b upset n he is there to take u out for dinner;)


10.Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He dint have to hear about all the men she could have married; and she dint have to listen to him tell how his mother used to cook ;)

Funny Quotes

1.By the time you swear you're his,
Shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is infinite, undying -
Lady, make note of this: One of you is lying.;D
-- Dorothy Parker



2."And what if,
In your sleep
You dreamed ?
...
And what if,
In your dream,
You went to heaven
And there plucked
A strange and
Beautiful flower ?

And what if,
When you awoke,
You had the flower in your hand ?
Ah, what then?"
Samuel Taylor Coleridge



3.Why do we treat the fleeting day
with so much needless fear and sorrow?
It's in its nature not to stay:
Today is always gone tomorrow.



4.The duck looks smooth and calm on top of the water
But underneath there is restless peddling.
In life nothing worthwhile comes without struggle.



5. TERE MERE/WOH SAAT PHERE;)
1st-for nourishing and pure food.(Go for organic only)
2nd-for healthy and prosperous life.(no wonder the weight gain)
3rd-for wealth(Root of all misery)
4th-for increase in love and respect for each other(love fights)
5th-for beautiful, heroic and noble children(Ah,here they come)
6th-for peaceful long life 2gether(jhelo n jhelao)
7th-for lifelong friendship(become FB friends)



6.Jinke ghar shishe ke hote hain woh basement me kapde badalte hain".lol


7. TRAINING COURSES FOR WOMEN;)
1.Understanding the Male Response to "Do I Look OK?"
2.Parties: Going without new outfits
3.Bathroom Etiquette I: Men need space in the bathroom cabinet too.
4.Bathroom Etiquette II: His razor is His
5.Introduction to parking
6.TV Remotes: For men only."
7.Communication Skills:Tears -The last resort, not the first!



8.An English teacher wrote the words, 'Woman without her man is nothing' on the blackboard and asked the students to punctuate so that it made sense.
The boys wrote: 'Woman, without her man, is nothing.'
The girls wrote: 'Woman! Without her, man is nothing.'



9.How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals." !!!!!!



10.To be interested in the changing seasons is a happier state of mind than to be hopelessly in love with spring........